if any of you ever even fucking THINK of committing suicide, I'll immediately disown, kick or generally be cross with you.

a film-style update to the links to bring joy into the hearts of many (well those with time to read stuff online): http://ter.air0day.com/?script=archives
it seems to have brought many times of happiness to others. the star wars ones are particularly good. credit for finding it goes to my brother. as Kath says, for he's a jolly good fellow...

what am I doing with my life? dear, dear me.

Timetable of last 2 days:
11pm the previous day, BST(1am am greek time ): got 'home' to greek apartments from sardine festival
6.30am BST (8.30am greek time )got up and started packing
8am BST (10am greek time) was out of greek room. all things moved to kim and mike's room temporarily
about 12.00 Midday BST (2pm greek time) swimming in agean sea
2.30pm BST (4.30 Greek time) Back in appartments ready to go
3pm BST (5pm Greek time) bus to airport left polychronos holiday resort, with me charl bod and bryony on
about 5.15 BST (7.15 Greek time) arrived in thesaloniki airport
5.45 BST (7.45 greek time) had moved 1.5 metres to the left whist queueing to have luggage checked
between 6 and 7pm BST (8 and 9 pm greek time) overdosed on free duty free chocolate and perfume (including 'pure poison' - hooray for french adverts! charl on britney spears' perfume and edward on barbie. hah. in ya face)
7.30 BST (9.30 greek time) boarded airoplane whilst practicing sumerset accent
between 7.30 and 11pm bst(9.30pm-1am greek time) sat or airoplane, watched cities be small, worried about deep vein thrombosis, watched 'millions' pretended to revise for saxophone exam. got slept on by charlotte. got frightenerd by takeoff and landing.
by 11.30BST (1.30am greece) were watching luggage carousel and telling edward to shuttup his face. watching man with barcode tatoo on neck. by now thoroughly sick of perfume.
by 12.10 BST (2.10am greece) had left airport
sometime around 2am BST charl has to stop to try to sleep a bit
not long before 4am hear editors on radio 1
around 4am got home - mum who has been house sitting coincidentally just got up for water. comment on coincidence
before 5am went to sleep
9am got up again
9.06am pphoned mr watkins
between 9.10am and 10.35am generally panicked (quietly) about saxophone exam
11.am arrived in school and practiced sax piece with mr w.
11.30 left school for tycroes primary school, situated somewhere in wales
12.30ish arrived at said school
between 12.30 and 02.10 hung around and silently got nervouser
2.10 to 2.30 pm on tuesday july the 19th PASSED GRADE 8 SAXOPHONE!
2.31 went back to llandovery
home by 5pm
about 7pm found out I had passed grade 8 saxophone
7.01pm was very chuffed
9pm phoned sax teacher, discovered I wasn't far off a merit
was chuffed some more.
1.am BST 20th july (3am greek time) wrote about it.
for once I am proud and proud of it. I have passed grade 8 alto saxophone! one of those 'never to be got' things. with a little help from a nice examiner I do believe.
Missed y'all terribly whilst away - thousands of miles seems such a long way.
1.05am - fell asleep at keboard.
(hope to see you all reallly soon. we may need help watching the house at some point. and maybe any alcohol that may be brougt by the house sitters might need to be kept in check too. that is if we can be bothered to organise it all.)

everyone seems so pissed off with the terrorists of the london bombing - I know it's a bit cliche, but remember how many innocent people are killed in wars too - sixty years ago atomic bombs were dropped on the japanese cities of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, killing 100s of 1000s of people. with very little warning.
but I suppose people still have the right to be cross now, as no doubt the japanese and many other victims have been over the years. but remember the perspective.

1) hahahahaha it's the 'spot who's just finished school/college and has nothing better to do (or nothing that involvs less moving) than write blogs' competition. I need a life.
2)AAARGHH! the damn bloody olympic games! the result will be known when anyone reads this but on the news this morning it was saying how Jack Chirac started on about how britain - no england sorry - had rubbish food. So the british tabolids responded by calling him names (I've forgotten what) and with witty slogans using 'crep' instead of 'crap', with all of its negatie and degrading connotations. This is just about who has the olympic games and they're bloody fighting over it. like schoolboys! THis is what starts off or at least keeps racism, prejudice and wars going. Lots of people will say 'it's healthy' or 'just a bit of fun'. I don't give a damn. I really hate the anti-french prejudice of the british - letting alone the american argument, which I'm not going to go into now, though I will say, nevermind the culture,many of the actual people aren't that bad. the real ones in any case - but the british hate french people for no reason, apart from history, which is stupid. and now people think it's ok to make racist jokes - or jokes about gays, the disabled or other past subjects of prejudice - because 'it's not serious' but the more it's done the more it's accepted and the more it'll subconsciously affect people's minds and oppinions.
I hope britain damn well doesn't get the olympics and spends the money on something slightly useful like schools or public transport. and I hope that france doesn't get it so no one feels cross with them. *sigh* what is this world coming to? I'm sure us younguns could do it all so much better (said in the innocent and headstrong voice of youth - not entirely seriously)

Well! I liked Kath's blog - fabulously written. you'd think she studied the language somehow..
and this is in no way degrading/copying/upstaging it, I just thought I'd note a few things on the subject of the G8/live8 (but in a minute,when I've read the 'guide to G8 blockades' that my mum has sent me)
1) the rubber wrist bands really are made in sweatshops! did everyone else know this already?
2) the guy who organised 'make poverty history' is a real corrupt rich guy. or so my brother says (so it MUST be true). Well, he said he was not the most moral man in the world, but he also said he got this info from a communist magaziene,which MIGHT be slightly inclined to th conspiracy theory side of things, but it all seems likely enough to me.
3) apparently Bill Gates went to the live8 thing in philadelphia. I know kath says it's all as much about the trade as the debt, but bil gates could probably repay the debt money without noticing it had gone from one of his many accounts. the world is a funny place.
4) from the bbc news website on the topic of edinburgh protests:
"Amid the violence there also were peaceful protests with demonstrators dressed as clowns and some even stripping naked."We're anti-capitalists, we're for trade justice," said one woman in a clown costume calling herself General Lovely. On the west coast of Scotland, about 700 protesters gathered outside the Faslane nuclear submarine base to highlight the fact that wealthy nations are still selling weapons to developing countries."
And the great David Rovics was probably at the faslane protest, thanks to mum, who arranged it despite being busy saving the world in the way of editing things and thinking about getting her stuff out of our old house (at last! but does anyone have temporary space for a baby grand piano, by any chance? heh)
I do like the sound of the clowns.
5) the 'guide to the blockades' says "In case of the network breaking down, people
might want to have alternative means of communication. Bike messengers,
walkie-talkies, flag waving, smoke signals, whatever. Don't keep trying
the phone network, you will only slow it down further. Use megaphones,
and talk with the people around you so that you can act together." it sounds like so much fun! imagine using smoke signals.. Ohh how I wish I were there.
6) those damned wristbands again: at least they DO show something positive more than making money. I don't refuse to give to charity like some people, who say we shouldn't have to because they shouldn't be needed because the money that the government spends on weapons should go to the causes, but I do think we should have a mixture of positive action and charity, so that the charities' situations are not as likely to remain as they are but will improve. so yeah, the wristbands at least do say a big 'fuck you' to the government. in some ways. or a small one. (and no matter what the sunday times style magaziene says, mine really do give me a rash), but aren't they really just another version of the badges that used to be left in boxes by tills in smaller shops and banks to appeal to the guilt/impulse buyer?

hahah I was in oxfam bookshop today and as I went in there were a whole load of lads (no other word for them) just leaving saying things like 'you should have got one mike' 'you mean bastard' etc. whilst fiddling with the catches on their own. it was sweet because they were either embarassed or excited about their trip to the charity shop. but I very much doubt whether they actually know much about the whole G8 thing apart from it has something to do with bob Geldoff. though I must confess to being rather ignorant of the facts myself, though I know enough to know that the anti-G8 feeling is not only Geldoff and his little army, but that those who think of themselves as true campaigners don't like him because it's all too false. I remain neutral on live8. I'm sure it's done some good. Mr geldoff and his swearing are not everything.In homage to a friend of the family, Jon, alias Jonattheprinters or Jonny "we H8 G8"...just as he was SO proud to have worked out the H8 is textspeak for Hate. awww.

Apathy is a symptom of depression...

...therefore our whole society must be depressed.
We live in a time and place that it is out of place to care too much. If we become too involved we are seen as different and strange. If you davote your life to saving cats, then you're a crazy woman (or man). If you travel long distances to see one piece of art, a band or a place, then you're fanatical or obsessed. If you were to suggest walking from lands end to jon o' groats just to make a point everyone would think you were weird. Is this because people don't actually care that much, and if someone else does it makes them feel ..something. wrong? different? superior? guilty? it just seems a shame that people can't care loads about things without seeming weird. It's obviously more apparent in teenagers. The famous apathetic teen who grunts and doesn't give a damn if they drop their chewing gum on the street, if their parents tell them their room is too messy or if a few thousand people die in a bombing attack. Crying when you think of children being killed by soldiers is wimpy, crying because it's the last episode of friends is ok.
Just some of the excitting paradoxes of modern life. As for me, I am going to sleep it rough, go long distances, get arrested, break into places by climbing over fences using elaborate fence-climbing devices (they do exist), walk places, live in trees, get caught up and make a difference. And if I don't do at least many of these things over the next year I give permission for people to force me to drink three shots of absinthe in a row. so there.