doing things that you wouldn't usually do is incredibly good for you. too much routine can make you ill and no doubt, causes cancer (though since just living seems to cause cancer these days perhaps the only cure is mass-suicide, though i'd rather not consider that) while changes are really good at making your brain work better - even brushing your teeth with teh other hand. i thinks that's why music fest was so good. i pretended to be a confident person for a week and almost pulled it off, though it flagged a little after the first... day. and now i'm playing the sax in a different way and all sorts of other things, thoug i was planning to change before that started too, sort of.
what i'm mostly talking about is the fact that i walked up constitution hill, or whatever it's called, in aberystwyth, today, which i ahve never done before, despite having lived there for all my life - sort of. it was a spur-of-the-moment descision too, as i thought i'd walk from the pier to then end of the prom, then once i got there i suddenly decided to go up (is this perhaps the influence of the simpsod and homer's 'stupid risk' docterine? i think we should be told.) and it wasn't fantastically exciting, but nor was the alternative, namely walking home and watching telly for the rest of the day. or whatever.
sigh, and i am missing sax course rather badly, though for some reason i have the feeling that someone from there might read this, thuogh i don't know why really, but i don't want to say much more, just in case. though there's nothing nasty i'd want to say as it was a thuroughly enjoyable week (is that why i don't want to say anything - it is a little embarassing that i enjoyed something like that so much and took part in next to none of the extra-social activities. i'm a simple country girl, i'm afraid and am falling behind or something, with social stuff. i sometimes feel i'd be happier living a few decades ago when we were not expected to want to go out and get drunk every night once we're past our 12th birthday or whatever. call me sad if you will, but i really do find pleasure in other things.
no really do call me sad, because i am. and i admi it, but at the moment i'm enjoying life too much to do anything about it. and i don't think i can do anything about what i like anyway.
oh dear.
i think i'd better give up now before i embarass myself even more, or reveal any more awfully dull things about my life
if you can understand any of my rantings
to finish the previouslt begun story, i went up a hill because i could, then i came down.

and as an after-note, i tend to write these things after midnight at my dad's, so i haven't usually seen any of my friends for at least 48 hours and that can leave me not always unhappy in a depressed way, just a bit more odd mabe
even this doesn't make sense
i think i'll go to bed.
bloody washing machines, eating my pound coins
sleep tight eveyone, especially if you are reading this between the hours of 12am and 4pm and 7pm and 10:43pm
have a good day